Reyes Gibbs Blog

Who belongs and who doesn't?

Recently the San Francisco Presbytery voted by a vote of 167 to 151 (needed 161 to pass) to continue the ordination process for LIsa Larges, a deacon of Noe Valley Presbyterian Church. A woman God created unique and a lesbian.    She has been in the process for 20 years.  Everyone who knows Lisa speaks highly of her pastoral and preaching skills.   On the Floor of the Presbytery her Hebrew professor, stressed how she passed his Hebrew course with an A.   Lisa is blind.   He said that she was an exceptional student.   Accolades abounded about her as a person. About her as a woman of faith.  And about her saying that she didn't believe that the the church's requirements based  around "same gender relationships" was an essential tenet of the faith!

I agree with her.  Our essential tenets are about the resurrection, Jesus born into humanity, Grace, Stewardship, God's omnipotence, God's sovereignty, Forgiveness and salvation thorough Jesus the Christ.   Our two greatest Commandments are Love God and Love One Another (even the ones you can't love!)  But as humanity does, we create rules, constitutions, books of disorder and etc so we can define who gets in and who doesn't.  The same rules that said that certain people sit in the back of the bus or study at different schools or have to live in different neighborhoods--rules meant to keep people in their place.

Just today, my husband and I had lunch in Lafayette at a very nice restaurant.  When we walked in, everyone noticed, okay so I may be a bit paranoid, but at the time, I was the only woman of color in the room.   Then within 30 minutes three more women of color came in to have lunch.   I looked around and wondered, how a place could be so white in the Bay Area.   I wondered what rules would they pass to make sure folks like me couldn't live there.  The funny thing (or not) on the way to the restaurant, three police cars stopped a van and sitting along side of the road were six men of color!!   So, I wonder.....
Now back to the church. 

My prayers are with Lisa, her church and her family as she continues her process toward ordination.   She is called and ready to serve, I am praying that the PCUSA doesn't get in God's way!!!

A proud Mama!!

I am very proud of ALL my children.   Kevin is feeding the sharks at the San Francisco Bay Aquarium and loving it.  Lauren is teaching 9th graders and earning her masters degree in Education from UCLA and started her own enterprise making hipapillows (I'll have the link later)  Beadle is managing working between Los Angeles and San Francisco and is having fun working for UbiSoft.   Deanne has her masters in Public Adminstration from the University of Pacific and raising a beautiful daughter.   Ron is having a great time in law school and we can't wait to celebrate his graduation.   Robin is going to school and working and raising three wonderful girls and having to arrange her schedules etc with my oldest son, Bruce.  Bruce is a New Church Development pastor of Mission Bay Community Church and was just recently endorsed as a candidate for the position of Moderator of the Presbyterian Church USA.

The Rev. Greg Roth nominated Bruce for Moderator  on the floor of the San Francisco Presbytery with wonderful words about Bruce and his abilities and what a good moderator he would make for the PCUSA.   Friends ask, "What's a moderator?"  A proud mother describes the position, like "President"  "Bishop"  or "Pope"  But really, the position of Moderator is one that requires traveling and meeting people to share with them the good news of the church (or maybe not good news sometimes!)  He will be the "talking head" of the church for two years.   When he walks in a room, the Presbyterian ritual is that we all stand up and clap.     Boy after the two years of his serving, I hope he doesn't expect us to continue that ritual.  I may be getting ahead of myself.  I know there will be other candidates for Moderator but I'm a little bias!!

All kidding aside.  I am very proud of Bruce.  He is articulate, compassionate, and has a great vision for the future of the church.   He also loves Jesus!!!   He will be be a wonderful Moderator.   The family is geared up to do what they need to do to campaign and to get out the votes.  Bruce has started travelingl the country.   If you want to contribute to his expenses, please send a check to the San Francisco Presbytery at 2024 Durant Avenue, Berkeley, CA 94704-1513, mark your check "Bruce Reyes-Chow Moderator Expenses" 

So for this moment in time, Bruce has the spotlilght!!! But with all my children, they shine constantly!!!! and whenever I look their way, I am very proud to be their mama!!!

A Body of Work - Yoga and Curves

I did it I signed up to the women's exercising group "Curves."  A good friend of mine has been going three times a week for the past three years.  I decided that if I went with her I would be consistent and follow through with it.

I have joined exercising groups and gyms before.   I sign up for a year, pay for a year and quit after a few months!!!  But I'm committed now!!! (Please pray for me!)  So for 30 minutes three times a week, I will be exercising to a voice that says, "Change stations now!"

I have also started Yoga.  I've done this before too!   I had to tell the yoga instructor that the last time I took a yoga class, I fell asleep during the cooldown, calming time.   Her response, "You probably needed to!"   I took that class in the evening so to avoid "sleeping during class" I am taking a morning class with my good friend (again with a friend I hope to be committed!)  We will see!!

With both these classes, the main question seems to be "What do you hope for?"    World Peace?
Since that can't be accomplished at yoga or curves, I'll settle for better health, more energy,  and just maybe losing weight! 

Judging...Another Perspective

Do you know any folks that will say, "I know what they need to do with their life!"  and then they go on to prescribe their idea of a better life.   Usually this happens when talking about communities or people who are not part of their own culture, social class, or neighborhood.

When folks come to me, I remind them of perspective.   We don't know a specific person's life experience, history or struggles.  We can't prescribe solutions to people's problems unless we have empathy for them or know of their struggles.

Why do I bring this up?   Its the time of the year, now, with the primaries, that people feel very free to share their opinions about the poor, welfare, immigrants, abortion, same-gender relationships!!!   And most of the time they have no clue about living a particular life (poor, immigrant, life decisons or same gender relationships, etc....)   I usually try to change the subject instead of engaging them in their opinion.   I've adopted one of my son's (Bruce) statements..."Do not engage!"

I also bring this up because of a blog that was referred to me that the blogger shared her life experiences and the struggle she has faced and her life now.    The person who referred the blog to me sent it to me with the statement, "I didn't know!"   My reaction was that we will never know everything about anyone and because of that we can't judge!  Only God does that!

General statements make me cringe!  ie. All fat people need to lose wait!!!  I know that, does someone need to tell me that!    What helps is an offering of here's what one can do to lose wait?
An offering that is out there not at a particular person.  That is why all those self-help books and programs are so popular...when people are ready they'll go to them.    No judgement just an offering of help when someone wants it!

I wonder what would the church look like if we became a place of safety for folks, no judging, just a place that will hope to offer help when needed?   Instead of judging people not knowing their life experience or their own experiences with God.   Judging implies that we know all the facts and we can make good decisions about folks.   That's why I know the only Judge I need to pay attention to is God.   Only God knows!!!!

Did you know....?

Whenever someone comes up to me with, "Did you know...?"  I want to say yes and walk away!   It only happens in church for some reason.    For me the "Did you know...?" is a signal for "I have some juicy gossip to share!" 

Gossip is going to kill the church.   Why is it we love Gossip?    Why is it important for me to know that so and so is getting a divorce or can't pay their rent or their children are out of control?   For some reason it seems that as pastor I should know about everyone's life!

Wrong!! I want to know about people's lives from the people themselves.   Okay, if I hear that someone died, I will act on that.  That kind of information is public and there is a need for pastoral care.    But if someone is getting a divorce, and the parties involved have not contacted me, then I have to just pray about the information I received.   If people in my faith community are hurting they do call me directly.  I don't wait for the "Did you know...?"

A church community sometimes feel that it is okay to share everyone's life with everybody else without regard to the person they are talking about.    So when I get information from a "Did you know....?"  I ask, "Did you speak to....?"  Usually, its a "no" and they got the information second hand.   When that happens, I respond, "I'll pray for them!'

It's too bad folks don't feel compelled to share the Good New of Jesus Christ with as much enthusiasm, energy and effort as they do about gossip!!!  If they did, church would be vibrant and with folks coming to faith communities wanting to know the answer to the question,  "Did you know...?"

Learning in Chaos

I bought a Mac.  I don't want to hear the benefits of PC or Mac!  I like it so far.   Especially the part of me going to the Genius Bar for help on specific Mac programs and help on my computer!

I went in the other day to learn about the Keynote (powerpoint) program.   I made an appointment, showed up a little early and observed the learning site.     It was in the back of the retail space, no walls, and in the midst of the craziness of folks looking at Macs and purchasing Macs.   The noise level was high and the staff was busy answering questions.   I thought, "Am I going to have a class in this place?  They must have a room in the back away from the excitement, people, and transactions."

When they called my name, I met my "genius" (this is the title of all the folks who help with programs and specific issues with your Mac).  His name was Joshua.    He invited me up to the Genius Bar.  I sat down and then asked, "How do people learn in this environment?"   He just smiled.

As he led me through the program and answered all my questions, it was if a wall was beamed around us and there was no interruption or distractions.   I was focused on the presentation and my need to learn as much as I needed to.  I just had a hour!!!   It was very amazing!  I didn't care about the people around me and I didn't hear anything that made me want to stop listening and being involved in learning.  In fact, the noise around me was like me working to the noise of the television or stereo or my mp3 player!
I remembered almost everything Joshua taught me and what I didn't remember, he gave me all the resources I needed to learn myself!!!

Its that way with God.  If I focus on God, talk to God, ask my questions and be patient for the answers, the distractions wouldn't give me the excuses I use to not spend or learn from my relationship with God.  So the answer for me is to focus more on what I want with God and what God wants from me!!!   I knew all this but the trip to the Genius Bar, reminded me of it, again!!!  It's all about focus!!!

Okay you PC folks, I know that PC are wonderful an Mac's aren't compatible! But when I had problems with my Dell, it took forever for me to explain the problem and another forever for the person on the other side to explain what to do!!!  That kind of choas I can do without.   So  one day, maybe, Macs and PC's will be compatible, but right now I am completely happy with the Mac chaos and my genious or geniuses!!

Now, time for God!!!  Peace!!!

A Conversion!

I bought a MAC today, the first day of 2008! 

So now I am transitioning from the PC to my MAC with the help of my son and the wonderful people at the Apple store.  The "genius" who helped me purchase my mac has a degree in "MIS", lots of experience in web design, etc.  and was able to asses what type of mac  would meet my needs without making me look foolish.   

I had been shopping for a Mac  by going into different Apple stores and browsing for the past month.  Since the folks who work there don't get a commission they weren't pushy, very welcoming, and authentic about really wanting to meet my needs in finding the right system.    Each time I left the stores, I felt like they really cared about me!!! They  answered my questions without making me look stupid.   I also was very comfortable with all the answers I received but most importantly, I believed that my PC was no longer the way to go! After I bought my Mac I also got a personal trainer! Such a deal!!  Okay, so I had to pay a little more.  But for a year I am invited to attend a one hour class each week on the different options Mac offers.   

So I was thinking how about the church?  I think we ought to send folks to the Apple "evangelism" school.  Our faith students  would learn what it means to believe in something so much that we are passionate just enough to make others comfortable about what we believe.  I know that we aren't going to convert everyone who comes through our doors. It is God who calls different people into relationships with different faith communities.  But if everyone who came browsing for a church was welcomed by folks who were passionate about their faith not passionate about getting people to come to church, fewer people would be scared away by the high pressure sales pitch.  If the folks looking for a better way in life and faith found through their experience  in worship and conversations with others in church helped meet need their needs, I know that folks would come back.  If Knowing that their questions would be answered, they would be welcomed back (no pressure)  and and they would get a personal trainer that would accompany them as they encounter all the new questions faith provides on the journey, people just may come back and stay!

Now back to my new Mac and a better way to compute!!!